Who Am I?

                                                           To: ME From: ME


Me. Who am I/me? Do we ever truly take time to know/find this? When we are in the process of growing up, we are told not to be selfish. This robs us right away of the "me". Or so it did me. It was well meaning of people who were trying to teach us that thinking of ourselves first is wrong. To sit day dreaming is wrong. No time for dreaming, it is not practical. No time for that. No time for that sort of play or believing. Hurry up now, we will be late. Color in the lines! This is the only right answer your guess is not right. Even though the instructions say to estimate. "She is so different from her Sister". "She should BE her Sister...this is how I judge her. Her Sister is so well behaved! She never acts out. She never cries when I say things like that. No, you must play with so and so. We want to be pillars in the community. We want things put in the paper. Who we lunched with. When our birthdays are celebrated, who came? No, do not go down by that pond. You can use your imagination there. There is calm by that water. DANGER! You must not enjoy yourself, you may be hurt or die~! Be careful up in that tree! Don't challenge me, I am God~~~!!!! Do you want a spanking? I will,you know I will! I have about had it with you~~~!!! Do you want me to tie you in that Bed? You have to go to bed before any good show is on television, so don't you dare sneak over there and watch! Creative? no we don't have time to create! Must be here and do that when so and so is there. Alone? why would you want to be alone? To Dream? Dreams are not practical. I did not get to have my own dreams, so you cannot have time to find yours, to find out who YOU or ME is. Me. I am Me. I am Bright, Creative, Talented, Pretty, Intelligent! How DARE you think that???? Thats so Rude and Selfish.!"

I am Me. I am the I. I am the wonderful Blue Eyed Blonde 3 year old with the pretty red socks. Don't go by the water to wash those socks!! They did not tell me that the reason not to go by the water was because they were afraid I might fall in and drown. TELL ME. Explain WHY. Don't assume that I will absorb the why of anything. I do not know how to do that,yet.

Me. I am Me. We are Me, You are We and We are all together! This may seem a bit mental, but I am typing what comes to mind as it does so. I will take some time to decipher it at a later time. Now I need to get it out, get it down on paper.

Me, I am Me. Is that not enough to know?

Yes it is. Me will tell me later what me wants. Right now me wants to simply be. Yes BE!!

Hugs ME, I LOVE YOU.

Katie

To those reading this. I feel better having written. Thanks

Adding this on at a much later date. It is now the end of 2021. Lots of water has run over the dam. I must have been a bit angry when I first wrote this. I am glad I did write it. Things have changed a LOT since 2007. I was mad because of the way my parents parented me. I have been doing a lot of soul searching and realized that I was NOT a perfect little girl. I was probably depressed. Just looking back at some of the photos of the past, I did not look happy in very many of them. Probably because I did not want to stop what I had been doing to take a danged picture. Over the years   I have come to the conclusion that life is just what it is. Everyone just gets along, doing what they have been taught or come to believe on their own, is the right way to live. So many people try to find sense in things, what is MY goal. What to do when that goal is reached, where do I go now? Is this all there is?  YES! This is all there is. Today. Now. Live each day the best you can and you will be okay. Trust me, through a lot of ups and downs, just do your best. I is all that is needed to do. Really! There is no magic potion. No Prince, no devined future. Stop looking. See what you have right at home. The Pandemic should have taught us all something. Did id? I don't know. I hope so. 

TeleSeminar on the Power of Point of View in Fiction Writing

from Emily Hanlon and the Fiction Writer's Journey
December 11, 1 pm eastern time

Point of view or who’s story are you telling?

Point of View is the most powerful technique we have as writers. POV gets you out of yourself and into your character’s head, heart and gut—POV is seeing the world through the eyes of the character. Understanding and opening deeply to POV is one of the most exciting movements you can make as a writer.

In this TeleSeminar we explore the many facets of Point of View

• Making the move out of self and into character
• The difficulties of POV!
• The challenges of POV
• The freedom of POV
• Use of POV in memoir
• Spotting a character hungering for a POV
• What do to about recalcitrant POV characters

Register and receive a free e-book of Point of View Exercises

Register for the TeleSeminar and audio download: $20

Can't make the TeleSeminar? No problem... the program will be available as a download to everyone who signs up, whether or not you attend.

Order the TeleSeminar on a CD $30 + postage

The CD will be mailed to you shortly after the teleseminar is held. With a CD, you can enjoy the teleseminar in your car or regular CD player.

Countries in Europe with country call-in numbers:
Austria, Belgium, France, Germany, Ireland, Italy, Netherlands, Spain, Switzerland, UK

New TeleSeminar: Identifying and Defanging the Inner Critic

Tuesday, October 23, 1 pm eastern time

Imagine your mind is tuned in to a radio station run by a single disc jockey: your Inner Critic. It seems no matter which station you tune in, sooner or later, the Inner Critic takes control. Worse, you have no way to turn down the volume much less turn it off! In fact, you’ve grown so used to the Inner Critic's comments and criticism, judgments and evaluations, that these usually foul condemnations of self feel like your own true voice.

Read more about Defanging the Inner Critic teleseminar

http://www.thefictionwritersjourney.com/telesem_inner_critic.html

This free TeleSeminar is for anyone: Attending the August Retreat: Women, Creativity and the Journey of Soul. Interested in attending the August Retreat. Interested in exploring the myth of Inanna and the feminine journey of initiation and descent. The TeleSeminar will include a telling of the myth and an exploration of its main characters as well as a discussion of what the myth means to us as creative women. The myth of Inanna is a call to wholeness; a journey of renewal of spirit. In exploring the myth, we will explore: The meaning of embracing the shadow. Why the journey of feminine initiation is a journey of soul -- for both women and men. Why the journey is always a descent. I have written about the myth and the journey of feminine initiation in detail on the retreat pages. Please explore them and if you are interested in attending this free teleSeminar, please call me at 914 962 4432 or email me: " Where you stumble, there lies your treasure." ~Joseph Cambell The August retreat is a call to reclaim lost parts of self from the shadows. Nestled in a nourishing and private retreat center in the lush foothills of the Pocono Mountains in Pennsylvania, we will create for ourselves a place of women where, through a variety of means including writing, mask making, myth and other interactive experiences, we will enter the Mystery to honor the depth of the feminine. Email Emily to Join the Free TeleSeminar The August Retreat on Women, Creativity and the Journey of Soul www.creativesoulworks.com

Journey of Women, Myth and the Deep Feminine

Explore a deepening of the journey for the Women, Creativity and the Journey of the Soul: Embracing the Gift of the Shadow.

The August retreat is a call to reclaim lost parts of self from the shadows. Nestled in a nourishing and private retreat center in the lush foothills of the Pocono Mountains in Pennsylvania, we will create for ourselves a place of women where, through a variety of means including writing, mask making, myth and other interactive experiences, we will enter the Mystery to honor the depth of the feminine.

This is a call to wholeness; a journey of renewal of spirit. Join us as we discover that our deepest fears hold our deepest treasures...

http://www.creativesoulworks.com/workshop_reclaim_shad.htm

The Creative Process, How and Why It Works

A New TeleSeminar from Emily Hanlon on April 24 at 1 pm eastern time.

You get an idea for a story. It comes in the proverbial spark of inspiration! It's a great idea. Inspired, really. You feel kissed by the Muse and can't wait to sit down and write. But ...

No sooner do you begin than your great idea, the visions, the excitement — the very Muse herself — vanish.

Still, you press on. You struggle to find the right words, the perfect first sentence or intro paragraph, but this only makes things worse. Feeling frustrated and confused, lost in chaos, you succumb to the mean-spirited taunts of the Inner Critic. "Who were you kidding anyway? You're not a writer. Look how easily you give up!" the Inner Critic gleefully spits out the poisoned darts. "The idea was stupid to begin with. Inspiration, my foot..."

This is the point where most of us give up.

We shouldn't.

Even a cursory review of the creative process tells us why. This confusion or what has been called the "chaos" is a vital part of the creative process. It is the right brain or intuitive aspect of the process, when all things are possible and nothing makes "rational" sense. In fact, the rational part of your brain, the part that looks for reason and order, is better off taking a nap when chaos reigns!

Creativity can no more do without the "chaos" than the earth can do without the winds, the rains, the snow and the sun.

However, the chaos or intuitive, right brain exploration is only one half of the creative process. By its very nature, creativity moves towards definition and completion. The right and left parts of the brain work in unison. They are equal partners in the dance of creativity.

Understanding the Creative Process Can Alleviate Writer's Angst and Change Your Relationship to Your Self and Others

The Creative Process: How and Why It Works!
TeleSeminar and audio download: $20. Register

A Question on Interviewing Characters

I received this email this morning and thought it was a very good question:


"I have been reading the Partial Listing of Questions and I have a query...When I got to question 13 Describe something really bad you once did... How would one answer that from a psychopathic personality point of view? Since guilt is not in their make-up. What would be another way to draw this out?"
Diana


My response:
Hi Diana,
Interesting question... I think what I would do in interviewing such a person would be to first show interest in his/her activities, crimes... get him/her talking about them, really opening up, and all the time you, as the interviewer, must show sympathy and support. Look for openings that could lead to memories that reveal how the person was treated as a child...

I think the key is for you to be a really good empathizer and, at the same time, read between the lines. As soon as you sense some emotional hurt coming through... perhaps through an outburst of anger, show a lot of sympathy and say, "Yes, that must have been very difficult for you." Or "Wow, I can understand how that could have made you really really mad... Do you remember how you felt when that bad person did that to you..."

In effect, you are leading the witness... trying to find a way through a mirror of the character's emotions, even if the character doesn't consciously feel what is going on...

Also, the character most likely wasn't born a psychopath... so lead them back and back to earlier times until you get to a point where the wounding was felt.

Hope this is helpful.
Good luck!
Emily


You can get this list of interviewing questions when you purchase the audio of the TeleSeminar on Interviewing characters. It is a package that includes the audio download as well as two e-books. Explore the TeleSeminar Package.


"I thought the TeleSeminar was GREAT, one of the best ones I've ever been involved with. I was caught up in it from the first minute. Excellent job by you and by Janet, and of course by Katie and Carla! I've been interviewing my characters for well over a year now, but this has me eager to jump into it again!"

Kari Kilgore

Special Offer on Last Week's TeleSeminar

Character Development in Fiction Writing:
The Art and Technique of Interviewing

Because of the exciting feedback I have been getting on this week's TeleSeminar, I am holding the pre-TeleSeminar prices for audio downloads and CDs for another week, through Friday, January 20. These prices include Janet King's inspiring e-book on Interviewing Characters and more...


Read What Participants Say About the TeleSeminar

"Thank you soooo much for a great TeleSeminar yesterday. It showed me that many of my thoughts and concerns are shared by others. Especially, the difficulty of merging myself, my experiences and those of my characters.


~ Susan Calvert



"I loved the seminar....I'm so busy trying to talk to Mae I haven't time for suggestions (can I talk to more than one at a time?)... I'm still trying to decide for myself whether I'm consciously pushing my character to say what I want or if it is authentically her, or the subconscious. I loved the idea of interviewing the Inner Critic....I plan to do that one tonight!

~ Louise Easton



"I didn't realize the depth that could be reached through interviewing...So, I really enjoyed this TeleSeminar and look forward to the next one. I find the TeleSeminars are allowing me to grow as a writer as well as realize that although writing is solitary, I am not alone in the struggle and the fun."

~ Carolyn Rowland


"I thought the TeleSeminar was GREAT, one of the best ones I've ever been involved with. I was caught up in it from the first minute. Excellent job by you and by Janet, and of course by Katie and Carla! I've been interviewing my characters for well over a year now, but this has me eager to jump into it again!"


~ Kari Kilgore


Read more feedback and explore the special offer at:
http://www.thefictionwritersjourney.com/Telesem_Character_Dev_spec_offer.htm

On Finishing a First Novel

Kari Kilgore recently sent this message to her writing friends and it is so inspiring, I asked her if I could post it on the blog... and she said, yes!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm writing to share something I wouldn't have believed possible before I attended Emily's workshop in Marblehead last December (2005)-- but ever since then I've been determined and confident this would happen.

Last night, a bit after midnight but before I went to sleep, I finished my first novel! After nearly 140,000 words and never ending stops and starts, it's hard to believe the two simple words "The End" could be so meaningful and profound to me. Rewriting and editing are still to come, but for right now, this part of the journey is complete. All day long today I've thought I was feeling a bit hung over from one too many martinis, but I think it's every bit as much of an emotional hangover. Jason tells me it's just post-partum depression, and that feels right to me!

Being a good Virgo, I of course want to do a read-through to make sure I didn't leave any huge errors, and to adjust things that I figured out at the end, but as soon as that's done, Emily and I are going to dig in. I've even gotten over my nerves about that and realized every time I or someone else goes through it, the story will get sharper and tighter, and the characters will get stronger. I cannot wait to get started! I'm also eager to get started on the second book and see what's next.

I'm sharing this partly because many of you have been encouraging and inspiring along the way, and I couldn't possibly be here without you. I'm also sharing because this story has been with me for over a decade. I've thought it was dead more times than I care to count! But these characters, one in particular, have refused to let me forget about them, the story they wanted to share with me, and the journey they wanted to take with me. So if you've got a character like that, or even if you don't have the character or story (or a different dream) yet but know you will, believe within yourself that it WILL happen. We feel these things for a reason, and when the time is right, it's worth all of the hours and years and struggle and joy and tears and passion. It's all worth it.

So, thank you, and may all that you wish for in this new year come to you easily and abundantly.

Much love,
Kari

2007 Calendar of Writing TeleSeminar, Workshops and other Events

The 2007 Calendar is now available.
Lots of new writing and creativity events!


http://www.thefictionwritersjourney.com/cal_month.htm

Flight, by Carolyn Rowland

My eye was caught by the slightest of movement on the train window. A tiny almost transparent light green insect had landed during the train stop and was now moving slowly across the window. As I watched, the train began to move and instead of flying off, the insect clung to the window pulling its wings in closer. The train began to pick up speed and I could see the insect stiffen against the wind and pull itself closer to the window, trying desperately to
hold on. It slid slightly down the window as its grip loosened and then suddenly one leg pulled free. I willed it to just let go and fly but it continued to fight to hold on. The tension in the remaining limb holding fast was visible even though the insect was so small that details of it were hard to see. The train continued to increase its speed and finally, the insect was
pulled free, lifted its wings and flew.

As I exited the train at my stop, I began to laugh. I had been willing the insect to just let go and fly but how many times had I been the insect, fighting to hold onto where I was, when if I could only let go, I too could take to the wind on my wings.

Life,Ebbs and Flows

Why is it that Life sometimes seems to "get in the way" of normal living?

Because it is to be survived, not managed?

The reason I say this is that lately, although I had some individual plans as to where to go in my living....things have come into the mix that have told me what to do, not given me the chance to direct my own life.

Now that I think about it, much of my Life has been directed in this way.



                                                         Life, Ebbs and Flows


I am good at "going with the flow", so I shall survive this as well as the other skirmishes in the past.

My parents are going through a tough time in their lives, thus I am being pulled back from mine to help them.

This has not been a choice...as I am the only daughter and thus, expected to be the one to "do it".

Mom has been ill now for months, much longer than Dad recognized in fact.

I will not go into details only to say that this is going to be a fight for her life and she has the will to win, but I am not sure if she has the strength.

So, now each week speeds by us and we spend most of it waiting in vigil by her bedside as she goes through ups and downs in health.

She tends to get better, then slides back again. She has been in and out of the Hospital enough times now that I can no longer remember the true count. I have been going to visit for over a month now...well into 2.

Mom and Dad had moved into town from a lovely small lakeside home last December. The plan was to return to the lakeside come spring, but Mom's health quickly put the end to that dream for us all.

She seemed weak at our last meeting, frail and confused, lost but happy to see us. She needs oxygen at all times now apparently, for I have not seen her without it for a long time now.

The hospital moved her to a nursing home about a week ago only days after a major surgery. I still find that difficult to believe as she had barely had time to heal at all from that. It makes me wonder if it was done for financial reasons, not health ones. That angers me to no end and makes me leery of sending her back to that same home again.

Do not get me wrong, it is a nice nursing home...I have seen much worse. Until things change in the way nursing homes are run and funded, I do not see things improving much. They are just way understaffed with people who are not educated enough, paid enough or happy in their careers. You cannot pay someone barely over minimum wage to take care of our rapidly advancing elderly population without some consequences showing up.

Some of the workers are the best you could ask for. They truly do "love" the patients and treat them like their own families. I want to give these people a special shout out, Thank You! Bless your hearts, you made the time there bearable.

I do not really know where I am going with all this, perhaps no where like it seems Mom's life is going right now.

We nearly lost her now about 4 times, again I am losing count as this wears on.

I do not mean to sound negative or whiny or upset about any of this.

Nor do I mean to complain about any of it...it is just the way it is and I know and accept that...

I could go into many discussions about life with my parents, and how things have changed over the years.

Right now those changes and situations don't seem to matter much.

What matters right now is getting to the next level, whatever that might be.

Understanding and accepting is I guess why I am writing this right now.

I am trying to figure out where I fit and what I need to do to make this all better for everyone concerned. I am usually so giving and unselfish. Why is this so difficult for me now?

Through all of this though, I have learned much more about my mother than I ever expected to know. She has levels and ridges in her being that I never knew existed....for these truths I would go through this all over again....finding her inner soul and desires has given me new outlook on myself as well.

Knowing that things were different in her generation...things have improved for women over the years....maybe not fast enough, but for the better. Knowing that when I choose what to wear every day, I have full choice, I am not directed by any "rules" whether fashion or otherwise. This is a good thing to know. Younger women do not yet realize the way things used to be, and I am glad for that. This they will learn only as they grow older and wiser and look back on things as I am doing now.

We as women need to speak up. We can reach a new level if we stand together.

I began this writing at a far distant time from now. Mom passed away in 2004. I am attempting to put some sort of end to this writing. Time has quickly moved on since I wrote this. I am sitting here after returning home from a wonderful 2 weeks of vacationing in various places. I feel content at this moment, and very tired.

Mom has been gone over 2 years now, how is that possible? My Grandson Tyler is 3 today. The time has flown by and will continue to do so. I accept that.

Hunter is going to be 1 in December. Unreal that they can be that old already.

Time races on. The days zoom past before I accomplish much at all. I want to get
back to my Artsy side. I seem to go no further than to write more and more trivial stuff.

I continue to read every day, even if only for a few moments. It calms me, makes me feel better and allows some escape.

More later, hugs to me from me.

Creativity, A Call to Awakening Workshop

A new and inspiring workshop led by Emily Hanlon


October 13-15, 2006
The Country Place Retreat Center, White Haven, PA


The multifaceted journey of creativity is not limited to the arts. There is another level of creativity that beckons us: awakening to the deeper truth of who we are, or who we would be.

Labyrinth as a Metaphor for the Journey

There is a large, beautiful labyrinth at the retreat center; it is on a small hill that is bathed in sunlight. Taking advantage of such inspiration, we will work, among other things, with the labyrinth as the metaphor the journey inwards.

In the ancient myth of Ariadne, her half brother, the Minotaur, half-man, half-beast, is imprisoned at the heart of the labyrinth and fed the brightest and most promising youth of Athens in sacrifice each year. It is Ariadne, muse and guide to truth, who gives Theseus the golden thread that leads into the labyrinth, where he slays the Minotaur and then follows the golden thread back into the light.

Each of us has a Minotaur caged inside us. We, too, feed this beast the best and brightest of our creativity. In the workshop, we will use writing and other creative methods as Ariadne's golden thread!

Using the image of the labyrinth is a bridge into the deeper mystery of self is a powerful creative experience that shifts our relationship to self and allows us to hear our true voice.

"Back into the labyrinth, where we are found or lost forever."
W.B. Yeats

Explore the workshop at:
http://www.thefictionwritersjourney.com/Creativity_The_Call_To_Awakening.htm

To see the updated blog, please go to

The Blog of The Fiction Writer's Journey


http://www.thefictionwritersjourney.com/archives/blog.html

New Women Writers' Magazine

Atlanta, GA - Oct. 13 - Attention women writers!!Do you have short stories or poetry looking for a place to be published? Doyou have something to say or to share in a personal essay but can't find aplace to share it?April 2005 is the launch date for "Penwomanship," a magazine for the creativewoman writer."In searching for places to publish my own writing, I realized the selectionwas very limited," says Penny White, publisher of the new monthly periodical."While there are many magazines which publish fiction and poetry, there arevery few which publish strictly women's writing. I decided it was time to dosomething about it."The magazine will contain 48 pages of women's writing and artwork.Although seeking original submissions for the magazine, White likes to thinkof it as a type of "Reader's Digest for women's writing."I hope women will be motivated and inspired to write about their personalexperiences," says White. "All submissions we receive will be considered forpublication."But what's with the name of the magazine?White smiles. "There is an interesting story behind that. And that story canbe found on the website."The website, http://www.penwomanship.com/, currently contains some of White's ownwriting until she receives submissions from other women writers to put on thesite. Submissions can be made via submissions@penwomanship.com in the body ofthe e-mail only. Attachments will be deleted unopened. Submissions may also besnail-mailed to Penwomanship, P.O. Box 235, Pine Lake, GA 30072-0235. Formore details, please read the submissions guidelines on the website. Pay iscurrently five contributors' copies until the magazine is able to paycontributing writers. White hopes to accomplish this within the next two years.Subscriptions are also available via the website at introductory rates. Aprintable subscription form is also available on the website.For more information contact Ms. White at penny@penwomanship.com.

The blog has moved

For updated blog please go to http://www.thefictionwritersjourney.com/archives/blog.html

www.drjeanette.com

Hosted by
Doris Jeanette

April: Healthy Ways to Reduce Anxiety in the Workplace

Have fun listening to Doris Jeanette as she shares the playful side of life
on Planet Earth. Learn practical ways to change unhealthy anxiety into healthy
fears that can be skillfully managed as part of daily living. Thursday, April
15, 2004 at 1:00 PM Eastern Time.

Learn:
The Difference between Anxiety and Fear
How to Calm Down the Nervous System
What to Do When you Cannot Calm Down
Clever Things to Do in Public to Relax


May: A-mazing Ways to Develop and Use Your Intuitive Skills

Doris Jeanette will interview Jenna Catherine, author of Conversing With the
Future, Visions of 2020. Learn how to use your intuitive skills in ordinary
life, the stock market or to enhance health. Jenna has successfully managed her
own portfolio for 34 years, she will teach you how she does it, sensing with
her Chest! Learn to expand your mind and know more. Put your awareness in the
most a-mazing places. Wed. May 19, 8:00 PM.

To Register for free Teleseminars contact drjeanette@drjeanette.com --ask for
the telephone bridge number and code for the teleseminar you are interested
in listening to.

Dr. Doris Jeanette, licensed psychologist, is the originator of a new model
for human change.
Her A Natural Process for Opening the Heart, three audiocassette tapes or
CD's, are highly recommended by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, MD for emotional health.
She writes a regular column, "Sex & Love" for New Visions Magazine as well as
an informative Internet newsletter The Vibrant Moment.

Call: 215-732-6197, drjeanette@drjeanette.com



FREE Holistic Psychology TELESEMINARS
www.drjeanette.com

Hosted by
Doris Jeanette

April: Healthy Ways to Reduce Anxiety in the Workplace

Have fun listening to Doris Jeanette as she shares the playful side of life
on Planet Earth. Learn practical ways to change unhealthy anxiety into healthy
fears that can be skillfully managed as part of daily living. Thursday, April
15, 2004 at 1:00 PM Eastern Time.

Learn:
The Difference between Anxiety and Fear
How to Calm Down the Nervous System
What to Do When you Cannot Calm Down
Clever Things to Do in Public to Relax


May: A-mazing Ways to Develop and Use Your Intuitive Skills

Doris Jeanette will interview Jenna Catherine, author of Conversing With the
Future, Visions of 2020. Learn how to use your intuitive skills in ordinary
life, the stock market or to enhance health. Jenna has successfully managed her
own portfolio for 34 years, she will teach you how she does it, sensing with
her Chest! Learn to expand your mind and know more. Put your awareness in the
most a-mazing places. Wed. May 19, 8:00 PM.

To Register for free Teleseminars contact drjeanette@drjeanette.com --ask for
the telephone bridge number and code for the teleseminar you are interested
in listening to.

Dr. Doris Jeanette, licensed psychologist, is the originator of a new model
for human change.
Her A Natural Process for Opening the Heart, three audiocassette tapes or
CD's, are highly recommended by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, MD for emotional health.
She writes a regular column, "Sex & Love" for New Visions Magazine as well as
an informative Internet newsletter The Vibrant Moment.

Call: 215-732-6197, drjeanette@drjeanette.com



Dr. Doris Jeanette
Center for the New Psychology
503 S. 21st St.
Philadelphia, PA 19146
USA
www.drjeanette.com
215.732.6197
Author of A Natural Process for Opening the Heart, three audio cassette
tapes or CD's, that are highly recommended by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, MD. for
emotional healing.

Spring Rain

I sit here wondering if Spring will ever come...and now finally I begin to see signs....the grass is greening, the Robins have returned...and at last the days are warming up.....from 30 to 50....wahoo!

The flowers are struggling to break through the hardened winter ground, and succeeding at last to do so.

The dogs will go outside and be willing to stay for awhile without barking and wanting back in...

I have hopes of no more snow this year...but past years have proven that we may have snow well into April.

I tried to deny the last Snowstorm and that didnt stop it, just made me totally unprepared and lost while driving in it. I made my destination safely but had some nerves to calm afterwards.

Luckily it did not last very long this year. No blowing or closing of schools as in past winters.

Today is warm but foggy and it is raining. This is what makes flowers grow and Spring come and Winter go away....I think as I sit and find the positives in the weather.

Wouldn't it be nice if we could always put a positive slant on things....like the old song said, accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative...

I WILL the glass to be half full again, no more half empty.

See you next time friends.

Katie

Defanging the Inner Critic: a Journey by Judi Zillmann

What follows is a letter that one of my students, Judi Zillmann, wrote to her Inner Critic aka The ICK after doing the first journey in my workbook, The Art of Fiction Writing or How to Fall Down the Rabbit Hole Without Really Trying. Identifying, understanding and defanging the ICK is one of the most important journeys that creative people can take. It is the ICK who blocks us and stops us from writing from the deeper truth of our creative passion.

The first step to defanging the ICK is knowing that you have one and understanding that the Inner Critic is not all of you but rather one voice of many inside your head; it is, however, for many of us, The Voice who seems to be in command.

This letter from Judi to her Inner Critic is a unique and creative articulation of the truth that the Inner Critic cannot be killed. It must be defanged so that if can be brought into a working, if subservient, relationship to our self.

Read Judi’s letter and then begin exploring your own ICK. So that Judi’s piece makes sense, you need to know that the first journey in my workbook is titled, Journey to the Rabbit Hole.February 21, 2004, 11:33 AM


A letter to my inner critic, by Judi Zillmann

The lion looked mean to me as he roared his massive head; he paced around the hole in the ground, dirt flew up, his eyes grew wide as he dared me to come near. I made a quick move to see if he would follow me with those eyes or even worse his body. I didn’t want him to attack me. I wanted him to go away. I needed to get into that rabbit hole. As I watched his movements and his eyes, I tried to look away but his stare was inviting and at the same time very frightening.

“Listen here lion,” I said, “That is my rabbit hole. I can go into it any time I want and you will not stop me!”

“ROAR!” He went. “ROAR, ROAR!”

“Why your just a big, ugly pussy cat – anyone can see that. You think you can scare me with that loud voice of yours. You don’t realize my roar can be much louder, ROAR!” I went.

His eyes got wide as he backed away.

“I can overcome my fear of you,” I told him. “You think because you’re bigger than me that I’m afraid of you. Well, let me tell you, you big fat ugly beast, you can be tamed. Come see for yourself this moist piece of steak I brought just for you. I know we can be friends. I need you to be here. You will always be a part of me. Without you by my side, I might not ever see the good, the bad and the ugly; you bring out some of the ugly just by being you; you will teach me the good as we learn from our travels deep down in that rabbit hole. I hope you understand that with you by my side, we can accomplish anything. So don’t stand in my way. There is a journey that we will take together, if you will become my friend.”

The lion paced, drew back and ran ferociously around my rabbit hole; his tail waived in the air and he looked angry, about to leap. I threw the meat at his feet. He looked around side to side, then stood still. He seemed confused.

I walked a step closer to see what he would do; he didn’t move, but his eyes followed me. I took another step and to my surprise he hung his head as he walked toward me, moving with quiet steps that scared the heck out of me. Then he laid down beside of me, his eyes grew soft, his tail seemed to wag, and his roar was quiet as he nuzzled closer.

Slowly, I reached with my hand – it was hard to believe that this beastly lion that I feared had laid down beside of me. I touched him. He seemed to understand that there was a bond between us and I was no longer afraid of him. I wanted to travel down that rabbit hole, to see what was yet to be. I watched in silence as he slept by me and finally laid my head down on his side. He didn’t make a move. I was in awe of this beast this animal that was not afraid of me.

We slept for hours and when he woke, he jerked up and away from me. I froze as he backed slowly away and over to that rabbit hole. Then, it seemed, he was motioning to me. As I walked toward him, he roared and shook his head, but the roar was no longer fearsome. The lion was tamed. He was pacing in a circle around the rabbit hole, waiting for me. I saw him smile. The fear was gone. He was tamed. He roared, but it seemed more like a call this time.

“What is it, Lion? What is it you want?”

He looked into that rabbit hole, then looked at me.

“It’s O.K. Lion, we have a long way to go, but together we will make it, for we’re friends now not enemies.”

Happy Valentine's Day to Your Inner Writer!

The other day I sent this out to people on my mailing list.
It is my hope that some of you post your answers.
However, I did get an interesting email asking me "What exactly is my inner writer? I am confused. "

This is what I wrote back to her.

In answer to your question about the Inner Writer,
let me ask you:
What do you think the Inner Writer is?
If you're not sure, put pen to paper and write this:

Dear Inner Writer,
Who are you?

Then start writing without thinking or questioning what comes out and don't stop writing until you're done.

Hint... if you write negative or judgmental things, you're not writing from you Inner Writer.

Let me know how it goes.
Emily


If you, too, are wondering who or what the Inner Writer is, try writing to her/him. And if you do,
why not post your answers here.

If you'd like to post to the blog, just send me your email at emily@emilyhanlon.com and I'll send you
and invite. Then you can start posting.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Oh, and here's the original email on Happy Valentine's Day to Your Inner Writer:
And for those of you who did not receive the original Valentine's Day to the Inner Writer, here it is!

Here's an idea I had in the shower the other day-- a great Valentine Day's present to yourself from yourself.

Write a love letter to your Inner Writer!

Then put pen to paper and ask your Inner Writer to write one back to you. Or visa versa.

If you've never written to or heard from your Inner Writer, this is a great way to start. I know your Inner Writer wants to hear from you and you can bet your computer you want to hear from her/him!!

If you love your letters (and I hope you do!) and want to share them, email me your email address (if you've already become a member, just log on) and I will add you to the blog membership. Then you can post either or both of your Inner Writer love letters.

And while you're at the blog page, be sure to see what's been posted lately. Don't miss C.T. Baker's fabulous Inner Critic blog entry on February 8: Clogs 101: Symbol of a New Student's "ICK".; Guaranteed to inspire!

The Writer's Exchange interactive blog is at

http://www.thefictionwritersjourney.com/blog2.html



And if you haven't read the second installment of The Five Ingredients of the Scene that I recently posted,

that is at http://www.thefictionwritersjourney.com/blog.html



Happy Valentine's Day! Happy Writing

and don't forget to love your

Inner Writer and your writing!!

love and passionate witing,

Emily and Lyra (the name of my Inner Writer!)

Poetry Series in Mt. Kisco, NY

NWCA Creative Arts Cafe Poetry Series MOVES TO FLYING PIG FARM MARKET CAFE
NYC POETS WELCOME FOR A POETRY IN THE COUNTRY SETTING of Mt. Kisco
www.nwcaonline.org www.pigcafe.com

The Mt. Kisco Flying Pig Farm Market Cafe will be hosting the award winningCreative Arts Cafe Poetry Series for Spring 2004. Located at the Mt. Kisco Train Station, it's an easy commute from Grand Central on the Harlem Line (Brewster North) to the Mt. Kisco Train Station. The Flying Pig is famous for its wine and gourmet foods from local farms and orchards. Its warm, welcoming atmosphere makes it the perfect place for readings. As usual, there will be a feature poet at 7:30 followed by and open mike.. Also, if you arrive early, beginning at 6:30, the Cafe will offer a pre-reading buffet of selected gourmet they are famous for preparing will seasonal ingredients. There is a suggested donationof $5.00 at the door including coffee. Call Cindy Beer-fouhy at 914 241 6922 ext 17 for more information. Log onto www.pigcafe.com for directions.

Housed for 8 years at the Northern Westchester Center for the Arts, The Creative Arts Cafe Poetry Sereis received the Best of Westchester Poetry Series Award from Westchester Magazine in 2002.
Past features included Kenneth Koch, Billy Collins, Mark Doty, Gerald Stern, Amiri Baraka, Molly Peacock, John Hollander, Jean Valentine, Collette Inez, Sekou Sundiata, Cornelious Eady, Stephen Dunn, and hundreds more. Readings are funded, in part, by grants from the New York State Council on the Arts and the Bydale Foundation.

Check out the Cafe's site with menu samples and a history of the Flying Pig.www.pigcafe.com

Following is a schedule of Monday night readings planned so far:

Feb 9th 7:30 - Poet Brenda Connor-Bey - Celebrate Black History Month with award winning poet, writer and arts-in-education consultant, Brenda Connor-Bey i- a co-founder of New Renaissance Writers Guild, founder of MenWem Writers Workshop and a member of the Harlem Writers’ Workshop and the Poetry Caravan. Brenda will read selcetions of her work from her book Thoughts of an Everyday Woman/An Unfinished Urban Folktale and her new chapbook Spirit Seeker.

Feb 23rd 7:30 - HS Poets and Writers Night with HS teacher feature.

March 1 7:30 - Poet Kevin Pilkington and Ira Joe Fisher and OPEN MIKE

March 8th 7:30 - Poet Hal Sirowitz and Amanda Stern and OPEN MIKE

March 29th 7:30 - HS Poets and Write4s Night with HS teacher feature

April 12th 7:30 - Poet Susan Kinsolving and OPEN MIKE

April 19th 7:30 - Jean Valentine and Sally Bliumis and OPEN MIKE

April 26th 7:30 - Mt. Kisco's FAVORITE POEM PROJECT -pay homage to your favorite poet -read your favorite poem
and celebrate National Poetry Month by carrying on the oral tradition of poetry. Readings by
featured community particapents and celebrities and an OPEN MIKE!

May 3rd 7:30 - Poet Alessandra Lynch and OPEN MIKE

May 10th 7:30 - Vijay Seshadri recipient of the James Laughlin Award and Open Mike

May 17th 7:30 - ALAN SKLAR - A Special Evening of Short Stories by Saki read by freelance voice actor Alan Sklar

June 7th 7:30 - Poet CHARLES MARTIN -Mythology in Poetry at the Flying Pig -
two-time Pulitzer Prize Nominee Charles Martin Charles Martin reads from his new translation of
Ovid's Epic Poem - Metamorphoses followed by OPEN MIKE


More to come....